plz talk dirty to me
Kareoke will never be a sober sport
What the fuck I just showed up to court still drunk and the judge told me I smelled like his wife
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
Randomize
