i think it would be like really awesome if scientist could genetically engineer manatees to be like the size of goldfish so i could have one in my fishbowl and be like FUCK YEAH TINY MANATEE
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
The thing about being single is like Sunday morning sex is nice but so is Sunday morning eating Nutella from the jar in your underwear
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Randomize
