Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
We were hooking up and you crawled into bed with us, because you had lost your phone and didn't "want to be alone at a time like this."
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
Randomize
