so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
THE EAGLE HAS MY PANTIES. I REPEAT. THE FUCKING MASCOT HAS MY PANTIES.
HOLY SHIT. You're my hero.
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
Randomize
