dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
While in Europe, he bought me a pouring tap to put on my liquor so I don't spill. This means 2 things.1) He really loves me. 2) I'm a noticeable alcoholic.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
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