the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
Randomize
