k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
Randomize
