she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
Randomize
