at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
Randomize
