Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
Ordered weed last night from the delivery service, and who showed up...my old real estate broker. He said, "this is less stressful." Duh.
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
There's even glitter on my cock...
Randomize