It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
Drunk you assumed that me saying I thought squirrels were cute meant for you to trap one in my car by luring it in with ham. You're going to hell for this.
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
This guy kept trying to use "see? I'm clean. Cleared by the plasma place today." as a pick up line. This is not okay.
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
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