i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
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