I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
Randomize
