So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
Randomize
