How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
It seems that I didn’t convey clearly enough how well and truly fucked we are, Jack. Listen to me very closely: we are DEAD.
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
try to milk me bitch
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