I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
Before you even think your day was worse than mine, I had to disinfect and and stitch another dude's penis after his prince Albert got ripped out by an angry chick.
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
I hate you so much right now. You got us kicked out of my favorite bar because your drunk ass was hogging the Bluetooth jukebox and would play NOTHING but that goddamn skeleton song. IT'S NOT EVEN OCTOBER YET.
Spopky scrzy skeletonssz
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
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