no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
Turns out that my surprise "happy birthday" drop-in for my dad turned into a "my parents like afternoon sex a lot" realization.
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
Randomize
