belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
Found a pic on my phone from last night. You're drunk. Arm wrestling some guy. In the bar bathroom. At a baby changing station. It's my new wallpaper.
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
Randomize
