I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
A bitchslap is in order.
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
