New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
this boner is exhausting
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy."
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
Randomize
