we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
I woke up in his closet, with my shirt inside out and backwards, Rolos in my hand, a tortilla with a face carved into it stuck to the fridge with a magnet, a homemade bong next to the bed, and the door off the hinges... I need a chaperone.
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
Randomize
