why didn't you poke me back
So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
I never thought that at some point in my life I would end up in the back of a cop car dressed as Pumba #HakunaMatata
I'm highly inebriated watching star wars, this text was sent via the force
In other news, I just sneezed and almost shit myself. What is happening to my life??
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
Randomize
