You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
Randomize
