hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
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