Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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Sorry Melliiiraee69 hasn't picked any favorites yet.

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(228): View more from Mississippi

they just did a mariachi cover of free bird

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(407): View more from Florida

Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.

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(+66): View more from Thailand

A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure

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(705): View more from Ontario

I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.

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(763): View more from Minnesota

I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.

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(260): View more from Indiana

...oh my god that's like anal suicide

(1-260): View more from Indiana

I'm aware. I'm writing the eulogy for my colon as we speak.

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(703): View more from Virginia

His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head

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(509): View more from Washington

I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?

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(518): View more from New York

The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...

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