Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(708): View more from Illinois

the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.

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(302): View more from Delaware

She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.

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(678): View more from Georgia

so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.

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(917): View more from New York City

WISH UPON A TAMPON

(718): View more from New York

They constantly get farther than me.

(718): View more from New York

tampons.

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(518): View more from New York

i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock

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(289): View more from Ontario

you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window

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(508): View more from Massachusetts

I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen

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(210): View more from Texas

He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.

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(908): View more from New Jersey

I’m really regretting these suede pants.

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