I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
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