I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
Dude I pissed in her little brother's closet and when I tried to flush the doorknob her parents came out and saw me standing there naked, no more ambien for me
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
Randomize
