fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
You need Xanax blowdarts
I don't know what weirder, the fact that I flat out said "I thought I deleted you from facebook" or that she responded with "I just hacked your account and readded myself". Never thought I'd say this but I wish drunk me would stop making friends!
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
Randomize
