Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
The whole time we were hanging out my vagina was yelling at me like its a real live penis that wants to have sex with us what are you doing
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
Randomize
