There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
Randomize
