Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
I ishhh haha are u coming nack easyer?
the fact that I know you're asking me if I'm coming home for easter makes me believe I speak fluent vodka.
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
Dick very happy bro
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
Randomize
