If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
I'm too drunk to be surrounded by this many indians
How do you manage to be drunk and a racial minority so often?
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Randomize