but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
sorry i got drunk at sunday brunch and force fed carrot sticks to your cat
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Randomize
