hell yes lets make some ravioli
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
Randomize
