is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
How am I still drunk? Whoever said breakfast is the most important meal obviously didn't skip dinner and go drinking.
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
I booty texted him nothing but three exclamation points at 3:05am and he was in my bed 17 minutes later, lest you think punctuation is not important.
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
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