My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
Randomize
