it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
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