no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
I hope I'm pregnant just to spite you.
i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
I'm drinking reisling in a paper cup by myself in the garage.
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
Randomize
