Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
My mom just told me to drench my entire body in vodka for 20 minutes. I have never been this russian. no one has ever been this russian
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
By the way can you translate "sorry, she played you bruh" to Spanish? Some Hispanic guy who spoke absolutely no English callled me last night and when I tried to tell him he had the wrong number the response was "como? No no no no...." And then click. He was gone
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
Randomize