Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Randomize
