The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
The "don't get cum on anything" rule also applies to my furniture and scarves
That's not technology. Doesn't count.
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
Randomize
