This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
i decided to cut a 3rd hole in to my snuggie so i could masturbate all the time.. all time low? or genius?
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
Hungover at Subway, watching a business guy try to squeeze his way past my car to get into his. Bitch shouldn'ta parked over the line.
You truly are a temple of morality.
I am the night, I am justice, I am currently watching the fat biz guy pay a frat boy to back his car up for him so he can get in.
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