Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
Woke up with a treasure map of my room stuck with sticky tape to my ceiling. followed it and found $75 with a note saying; "eat this if we're invaded"... I'm never getting stoned again
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
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