You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
Hey, I can't get ahold of Tommy. Let him know his ex-girlfriend is pregnant.
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
Randomize
