does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
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