So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
Randomize
