First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
Randomize