belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
I sharted in my sleep... I didnt even think that was possible.
I'm going to die alone in a sea of empty vodka bottles and cats.
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
I just gargled with NyQuil
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
Randomize
