I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
Randomize